An Open Letter to Readers & Bloggers

Dear Blog-Friends,

Over the last (I think) 3 years, I have enjoyed your company. Better said, because of you, I have had more courage and self-appreciation.

It is with deep regret that I sadly tell you...I am quitting blogging.

My life is very full now - my daughter, husband, brother, school, dogs, cats, house. I just don't have the time to dedicate to this blog.

I thank all of you for your help and support. Please feel free to comment or email me (if you put your email in a comment, I won't post the comment).

Be Well.

Peace

Thinking of torturing myself again

I think those of us who take chances in our lives are more apt to be hurt and laid out for all to see. I also think that this same group grows more (and faster) emotionally and Spiritually. Of course, if I could learn things without having to fall off rocky cliffs, being sheared all the way down, I'd be much happier. But, my life is not meant to be that way. I don't fight it any more.

I'm thinking of starting a new blog. I'll keep this one, but, my new blog will deal with my soon-to-be professional life. I won't be able to link to it from here without giving myself away. So, once I get the new blog and the concept together, I'll let you know. And, if anyone is interested in reading the new blog, we will figure out how to get you there.

Peace

And then there was one...

I used to keep 3 blogs. Then, with NO readership to one of them, I cut to 2.
With my new "business venture" I went back to 3. There was NO readership for the "business venture" blog - which is fine... - so, I was at 2.
Earlier this week, the other blog was discontinued...due to lack of interest - by readers and me.
So, I've just got this one.
Which is fine.
I need simplicity. That is my goal for this "Christian" Calender year - making things simpler and less cluttered in my life.
Wish me luck...

Peace.

p.s. Is there a Goddess or God of De-Cluttering?

News

For all of those following the saga - which I haven't posted about in FOREVER...

The papers regarding child's living arrangements will be served upon the ex by this time next week.

How do we feel about this?

Peace

Informal poll

How would you feel if I told you I was going to return to school in January?
Oh, and have my new degree in less than 2 years?
Oh, and finally realize one of my lifelong dreams?

Peace

Looking a Gift Horse in the....

Things have been fairly lousy the last year or so. Yes, Freya is here - I think I need another name for her....But as for money, love, and general peace (piece?) of mind, it hasn't been working out so well.

This week, however, life is looking up. They are small steps (which I knew they would be) and there are no promises hidden in those prints. Perhaps this is one of the reasons I cannot become excited about the prospects.

With the Sun in Scorpio, I should be having a burst of power and energy; I have neither, in any facet of my life. I have a burst of hope, and a burst of activity, and finally a burst of Sun-shine. But...but...

BUT

My pessimism has gotten the better of me. Oh, sure, I can put on the happy face, act perky and spew out optimism and helpful hints. I'm pleasant, well-mannered, courteous, interested, and talkative. It is all for others - it is all an act. Could this be why I'm not sleeping well?

Sure, look a the bright side! See the glass as half-full! Look at the possibilities!

*blech* It frightens me to exhaustion - what if these things don't work out? What if someone decides they didn't make the right decision? How do I know what my instincts are telling me if I've been so apt to not listen lately?

Faith & Hope. Without those, we would perish.

I'm not quite ready to perish.

Peace

Why I should stop...but don't

You'd think Themas would have finished doin' her thing by now, but, nope! We are still in a bit of a life 'n death struggle with the pantomime Princess Margaret...er, sorry, got a bit Python there.

We are still in a struggle for the well-being of Freya.

I read the ex's wife's blog about once a week. I can't handle every day; and the entries I do read, most make me want to throw up.

I should really stop reading. The reason I don't is that all the nonsense builds my case. Sad, actually.

I have to remember to do some deep breathing and ask for some courage before I willy-nilly logon to her blog. If not, things that make me so f***ing mad get my stomach churning and, thus, put my mind in a foul state.

I suppose it is a good thing that Freya's father has someone he can devote himself to and do things for that he would not devote himself to or do things for me. In other words, all those things I found important and he found unnecessary are suddenly right and necessary with her. And, yes, she knows this and, yes, she does flaunt it - "he wouldn't dare do this for the bio-mom...because she was undeserving". Yes, that is written in the history.

OK, enough, right?

Peace

Insult to Injury

Away, you bottle-ale rascal, you filthy bung, away!
-Taken from: Henry IV, part 2

I think that because I've neglected my blog for so long, the template has decided to abandon me!

Well, off to find another template...and not calendar myself for more blog posts!

More New Beginnings

Last night was surprisingly wonderful. After a full-day of no relief from migraine, I thought any type of Blue Moon celebration was out. But, Psyche and Horus would not hear of that!

Daughter - who will now be known as Freya - wanted to see my Tarot cards. Mind you, these have not seen the light of the Moon in many months. I performed a simple reading - unfortunately, I didn't explain very well what type of question she needed to be asking the Cards, and the answer I got was screwy, and so was her question! We tried again; this time, a longer read.

Not having any idea what she might be thinking, I used a basic Celtic spread. Each card in each position made total sense to her. A few times she gave me the, "Well, DUH!" answer, which was eerily funny. However, the best times were those when Freya gave me the saucer eyes of, "How the heck did They know that?!"

The gist of the reading was right on; Freya knows that what she wants to do and needs to do are nearly the same and just not that difficult.

With full egotism, I will state ... I still got it!

Peace

How excited can one circle get?

Very, if it comes to all of those in my circle.

I've managed to excite 3 blog friends, one long-time friend, one friend I made through my Brother, Bridgette, couple of college friends, my Spouse (who is now named Patrick), my Parents, and, gee, there two more people....oh, yes...Me & My Daughter.

Why you should ask? On the twenty-ninth day of this glorious month of May, my Daughter will be moving in with Patrick and I.

Yes, you read that correctly - MOVING IN. And, not for a short time, either. Until she graduates from high school - she can stay longer, if she likes.

The joy is just flowing through and around all of us.

This will mean a lot of interesting blogging, I'm sure.

Peace

Wheel of Life

When I first started learning and practicing my Religion, I would hang on every "read" of my Tarot or Bibliomancy. Now, I realize these are just tools to help me make decisions.

There was a time in my recent history when I relied on yearly predictions - not what would happen during the current year, but in what year something would happen. I learned faster than was comfortable for me that, depending on the daily decisions I make, the particulars of a coming year would change. However, the general "outline" of the year would be right on.

So, where am I going with all this? If you are still reading, you will find out :-)

In 2000, I read that my life would have difficult change, I would be separated from someone I loved and it would not be until 2002 that I'd start to "re-settle". That year, I was separated from my Daughter, I escaped an abusive situation, and my life was jumbled.

In 2002, I read that I would not be with the person most important to me - in fact, our relationship would be tested - I would learn more self-sufficiency, have a dramatic change in careers, and, in 2007-8, settle into my "true world".

Whoa! I have to wait 5 more years?! What in the Psyche is going on?!

I re-read my Cards, specifically when it came to my Daughter. Yep, struggle, patience, money, time. *sigh*

In 2002, my (step) Dad had a heart attack and stroke - I learned how to be calm in such a situation, as well as how to haul and stack wood and throw it into a wood-burner. I could not find a full-time job, and began something off-the-wall (cannot explain as I may expose myself). and, in early 2003, I was served with papers - my ex wanting full custody of my Daughter.

In 2004, I had yet another odd career change (similar to the one I'm going through now). The Tarot and Books did not change much. However, the 12th year in cycle (Chinese Year of the Pig) will be successful in relationships, love, career and money. Well, hoo-rah!

Here I am in 2007 - Year of the Pig - 12th year in their cycle - my career has changed and is so far successful, the relationship with my spouse is changing (for the better), and my Daughter will be where she belongs (finally!) this year.

I'm not sure there is a point to all this. I had the need to share.

Peace

That field hath eyen, and the wood hath ears.

My lovely Daughter knows this all too well. She communes with Nature, always has. Yet, she does not feel it this way. She knows she can tame a stray kitten; she also knows she could tame a stealthy Snow Leopard.

Soon, if Demeter and Themis have their way, my wonderful Child will be here, where she belongs, and she can begin to reconnect with her Goddess and The Wood.

What has brought this wonderful possibility? Here are the high (and low) lights:

• Child, in plea for attention, acted out in a way which involved authorities.
• Child and all adults in her life (some fit the term loosely) were convened by an independent party.
• Wife of Child's father was chastised - more than once and on record - for the way in which 'she' interacts, deals with, and generally controls Child's life.
• Child's father agreed with my rendition of events and beliefs in raising Child than he did with his own wife.
• Child's father agreed that it is (finnally!) time to allow Child to live with me.
• Independent party will do their best to make certain Child moves here before next school year begins.

Please, thank your selected Supreme Being - God - Goddess - Life Force for helping me/us in this endeavor.

And, of course, I thank each and every one of you for all your love, support, prayers, blessings, gifted energy for helping me through this and having a successful outcome.

Once more is certain, I will post about it.

Peace

Children are born as individuals. If we fail to see that, if we see them as clay to be molded in any shape we like...

"...the tougher ones will fight back and end up spiteful and wild, while the less strong will lose that uniqueness they were born with"
Melvin Konner (20th century), U.S. professor of anthropology and psychiatry. As quoted in Childhood, a viewer’s guide produced in collaboration with Thirteen WNET (1991).

Yes, something wonderful is happening. More later....

Spirit of the wind Keep me safe

Everyone,

I will not be blogging this week. I have an errand to run.

Peace

Change is Bad

The changes I want to make to my layout, template, content will

1. Delete the cool blinky things in my side bar
2. Delete my cool background
3. Make my links go into some sort of Internet black hole

So, what to do? Well, haven't decided. Will keep you updated.

Oh, did manage to add a Meez to my side bar. Check it out.

Change is good

I've decided to change a few things on my blog - additions, deletions, moving-tions. It will take a few days, but I hope you will like what you see.

Peace