The bane of Americans is overwork--and the ruin of any work is a divided interest. Concentrate-concentrate. One thing at a time.

As far as I know it is not my "fault" that I suffer from migraines. The medicine I take either puts me out for 2 hours (shot) or upsets my stomach (pill). Yesterday, I had another headache. I had one 2 weeks ago - it was around for 2 days. I then had one start on Sunday; yesterday, it was very bad.

I couldn't take my medicine right away - Husband decided it was more important to go pick up the car that was in the repair shop than for me to get over my headache. When we returned, I took my medicine; which meant that I'd have to sleep for 1 hour then have a 1 hour recovery time. Apparently my saying, "I am closing the door and no animals are to come into the room" was not clear enough. After 20 minutes of animal chasing, I closed and locked the door.

During the second hour, Daughter and I watched some television. This gave me time to eat crackers and drink Coke (non diet). Husband did not understand why I had to be "out of commission"; I told him I'd be more than happy to be up and around, dizzy and throwing up if he liked. He was not amused.

As far as I know it is not my "fault" that our money situation has gone down hill, again. I kept to my self-imposed spending limit on gifts; I put nearly all my earnings into savings. Oh, wait - the car "broke" and my step-son moved - that's where it went. (Sorry, had to bitch.) I don't see how this gives you (husband) the right to bark and show no mercy. (OK, that was a bit dramatic; but that is how I'm feeling at the moment.)

I had no clue that husband thought he was not going to work today so that we could all do something "family". Being out for a day meant nothing got done around here; and with people coming tomorrow, I have a lot to do. Comments like, "If I had known we weren't doing anything, I could have gone to work," just aren't helpful. If you want to go to work, then go; wtf do I care at this point.

These mixed messages are becoming unbearable. I'm all for compromise, but this is just $h1tty and tiresome.

And, for those of you following the story, Husband has once again decided that "we" cannot afford to get a lawyer to bring Daughter here. Apparently, he has forgotten who I am...

Over every drowsy thing - And buries them up quite - In a labyrinth of light

My Daughter arrived yesterday.

My heart is happy.

I may not blog until the New Year (by the Gregorian Solar Calendar).

Peace

Truth is the highest thing that man may keep.

At this time of year when many give each other gifts of tangible sorts, I am blessed with gifts of heart.

I do not know why others insist on using lies and self-indulgent justifications to bring harm to me and those I love. I cannot take the precious time I have to figure it out.

I have recieved comments and emails and cards and letters from those who love and support me. For this, I do take the precious time I have to say a public "Thank You"

To L, it is best to howl at the full moon - more people are doing it at that time, so you won't look as crazy.

To Peabody, I will be strong - apparently, I don't know how else to be.

To S, knowing you are in my life gives me joy beyond belief.

To Willow, thank you for travelling so far to find yourself.

Peace.

Cowards die many times before their deaths; the valiant never taste of death but once

Again, I consider, giving up -

• On the hope of having my Daughter where she belongs
  
• On the hope of having financial security
• On the hope of not being part of a Tragedy

I will do myself no physical harm; nor will I give into the Depression Demon. On the latter, I cannot promise the incident will not occur after January 3.

Why, you ask, do I make this dramatic statement? For this reason:

My husband, who is the most honest man I have ever met - he will give you the truth, if you ask, even if it is not pleasant - has been accused of wrong-doing. Those who do not appreciate his honesty and committment have accused him of something he cannot prove the truth of. 'They' claim he did not appear at a particular place; he did appear, but has no proof. My husband must now hire an attorney and wait.

I am sick - hipocrasy makes me want to throw-up - as does the thought of going 3 steps back...again.

If this unfounded accusation is followed through, it will cost us the balance of our Daughter fund (of which most went to moving husband's son), I may need to ditch classes to work full-time, and proof again that those issues not resolved in my Past Lives are a force to be reckoned with.

I was hoping for a more light-hearted and intelligent post. To my reader's, I apologize.

Peace

The yeoman, the summoner learns, is a devil

Quick List:

• Have been laid-off from job. Depending on the workload, I will return to work the second or third week in January.
• Tree is up! Ran out of lights; usually do; can't figure out that one.
• Daughter arrives in 8 days. May I have a resounding "HOO-RAH"
• Waiting for snow
• The ex's wife is trying, again, to screw me over; all while smiling and playing nice. And, no, I'm not surprised.
• I'm happy!
  

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Roll Pop? Let's find out...wo-one, too-who...

Over the last 3 days I have made valiant attempts to post to my blog. I don't think I've ever received so many different error messages from an on-line program.

And, all the fun posts I had in my head are now in the outer space, never to be found again.

Today's post is quite ho-hum - I've been laid off from my job. I'm told it will only be temporary - 2 to 4 weeks. I won't mind having the time off - with Yule and Daughter visiting and many Winter projects to do, I'll be quite busy.

I'm changing my profile pict for a bit; something more Winter-Yule-Solistice-ish.

Trials and Tribulations of a Wiccan/Pagan working her way through this life thanking the Goddess each day for more cartoon heros

I've got much going on - much to share - much to write.

For now, here is a link to one of my cartoon heros from the past...and present.

Daughter Update

Note: I love comments! I'm almost as bad as another blogger who considers herself a "comment whore". I wouldn't go that far about myself; but one of the reasons I started this blog was to get outside opinions - to think about my situations from different perspectives.

I miss my Daughter. I will see her in 19 days. It isn't soon enough.

Her latest 'problem' is school. And, yes, if she were living with me, the issue would have been handled expediently.

She is pulling up her grades in school. She was sinking, which most middle-schoolers do. I can only throw a life-line so far - I cannot go into her school to talk to her teachers and I'm not there when she gets home to work with her on school-work. The 'people' that are there to do that decided not to - let her sink, she'll figure out how to swim. NO, NO, NO, NO, NO! Well, 'they' finally became "concerned" about Daughter's grades (a 'D' in Math) and, since her father has shown some interest in whether or not she got her work handed in and if she needs help, her grades have improved (now a 'C' in Math). Kee-riste! Oh, let's not forget - this is my fault.

Why? Well, she has my genes; she is a girl, the type of girl I was at her age. Her logic/reasoning for doing/not doing makes perfect sense to me. Very scary but, helpful. When she explains to me why she was sent to the principal's office and how unfair it is, I understand. I also know how to explain to her - in a logic she will understand - why, no matter how unfair it is, she needs to follow rules/directions, etc. This was something that her father and his wife could not figure out how to do. They were at a complete loss - they didn't act like this in school. They may have gotten in trouble, but never acted the way she does. They didn't raise her to be this way.

Yep, that last one got me boiling.

They didn't raise her. That's another post.

Back to school...

Now that Daughter is pulling up her grades and the 'people' she lives with are taking responsibility as 'parents', she is doing better. She asked me (ME) to help her while she is here - she needs ideas on better ways to study and her spelling.

Did I mention: she asked ME.

I love my reason for living.

Of Comments and Beta and Yule and Other stuff

Follow the bouncing ball...

• I've been submitting comments to someone's blog and the comments are not appearing. I am hoping it is because the comments are not making it thru to the person, and not that the person has decided that my comments are not worth approving.
• I'm considering moving to Beta, just so I can have categories. Opinions?
• Due to some unexpected huge expense, I will be unable to create my primo Yule decoration. I wanted to make it last year, too, and no money for it then, either. Perhaps this is a pattern/sign? Maybe I'll just create an animation and put it on my blog.
• Had a conversation with my Daughter's father and his wife last week. The conversations were "pleasant". Considering the history, I'm concerned this is the Dr. Jeckyll part of the latest encounter. Mr. Hyde always shows up. Shame, really.
• In reference to my first bullet, I thought about asking said person whether or not person was receiving my comments. However, I'm not sure I'd be ready for, "Yes, but, decided not to publish them because...(a) you are lame (b) you are stalking me (3) I do not succumb to drivel."

Peace

Julie Andrews on the Mount

I took the final test in my "self-directed" H&D-in-S course at the local U. It was a course not worth my time and energy. I'm not 18 and having my first year away from Mommy; I'm an adult who has been exposed to all types of things discussed in this class. The class was just an overview of a particular part of US life. I learned nothing; the course re-iterated my knowledge that I will do my level best to never administer a multiple choice or T/F test to students. Sheesh!

So, to the self-important instructor, " So long, farewell, auf Wiedersehen, goodbye
Goodbye, goodbye, goodbye"