Funny!

Be put in a cauldron of lead and usurer's grease, amongst a whole million of cutpurses, and there boil like a gammon of bacon that will never be enough.
-Taken from: The Two Noble Kinsmen

Informal poll

How would you feel if I told you I was going to return to school in January?
Oh, and have my new degree in less than 2 years?
Oh, and finally realize one of my lifelong dreams?

Peace

How do you know to believe someone?

Over the last 6 years, I've taught myself how to accept and be more tolerant of people. I am in no way perfect; I tolerate most people, but do not care for people who are self-righteous or who believe their beliefs are the only correct ones. I have also learned forgiveness - of myself and others. There are people who truly do make an effort to change how they deal with the world, their lives, and others around them. Some are successful; some are not. Success only counts if they want me to be part of their lives.

There is someone in my life - via Parvarti - who continues to insist "she" has changed and made an effort. That I am the one who is "holding up the progress" because I will not accept an apology or believe her. Unless the Goddess Herself comes to me and tells me to trust this person, I never will. I do not believe she has changed, nor that her "apology" was sincere. I believe her constant pronouncements to the world that she is a changed person and that she is a caring and loving person are proof that (a) she is not sincere and (b) it is all self-serving.

Cynical am I? Yes. It has taken me more than 10 years to even give my own father the benefit of the doubt that he has "changed" for the better. One cannot hurt another so severely to expect immediate forgiveness. At least, not from me.

I've vented. I can continue my day. Thank you for reading.

Peace

Interesting

No one means all he says, and yet very few say all they mean, for words are slippery and thought is viscous.
- Henry Adams

Double Bubble Toil & Trouble

OK, that isn't exact; it is what I used to say as a kid.

I hope everyone's Samhain was blessed and fruitful. I've decided not to write about mine. It was very personal this year. In today's entry, I'd like to write about other things going on in my (our) life.

To start with, Freya (daughter) has been renamed Parvati - the Indian Goddess of Perserverance.
Husband is now Rhian - I could not find a God of Endurance, so, I shortened the female form, Rhiannon.
I am still Ligeia.

Early this year, Parvati "got into trouble". Her dues paying is long, drawn out, and necessary. In a matter of months, her dues will be paid in full and she can place this "episode" and all she has learned into her Book of Life.

When Parvati moved here, Rhian and I were overjoyed - we still are. We had our "honeymoon" phase with her, which turned to the reality phase; now, we are in the everyday phase - a good place to be. Parvati has showed marked improvement in thinking, acting, responsibility and daily relaxing.

The relationship between Rhian and I is still at a standstill. To some, this would seem fine; to me, it is not. I grow and change everyday - we all do. I refuse to be stagnant in all parts of my life. Rhian finds stagnation wonderful. It is passed stability - which is nice and necessary! I realized over a year ago Rhian is depressed. He refuses to change anything about how he lives (or doesn't live) his life. I cannot be this way. My solution - because I do love and care for him - is to work with and around this, while still being my own person. I had problems with this for a while; putting more Faith in my life everyday is helping tremendously! Our relationship is not adversely affecting Parvati - this is important!

I am again working part-time. The last "permanent" job is now a "contract" (easiest way to explain) with little prospect of continuing past January. This is fine with me. The part-time gig is something I've done before and know I can do. It is not my dream job and the pay is minimal; but, it is something and fills the gaps until something more profitable comes along.

In January, when one aspect ends, another will re-begin. I will return to University. I am thrilled beyond belief! It will, again, be part-time; but it gets me closer to my goal! I have the same adviser (Thank you) and it is the same campus, but none of the people I knew 2 years ago will be there. This will make for interesting alliances!

Spiritual stuff next time.

Peace